Edition Maldives - EN

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Alice down the Rabbit Hole - Chapter 1

23 July 2017 - 15:06

Phamme Rushdan

Photographer and Designer

Chapter 1

The 21st century... what was that all about!?..  back then, dolphin revolution was a joke, and Apple didn’t even own it’s country yet , so what was the world like, well they still used toilet paper and didn’t even know about the 3 sea shells. 

Most human energy was spent trying to mate in new and exciting ways. Finding partners was organized using primitive electronic devices and so began the first ever world wide computerized breeding program well skip the actual birthing procedure, a number of historians have been in therapy for months now after reading about the process.

After years of research, humans finally invented a method to feed the hunger and cure all diseases known to man kind. It was revolutionary. Kids in Africa ate Facebook comments and likes were curing cancer and ending poverty. It was truly magnificent 

Humans spent their early life mostly eating, excreting and pissing people off on airplanes and then, they would expect you to grow up and immediately discover their lives purpose by the age of 14 other wise they were considered total failures, which seems entirely fair.

Then there were the failed steps of human evolution, people who preferred pineapple on pizza. They eventually died out due to unknown reasons. Probably cause they didn’t forward the chainmail’s to 10 people or so.

Working time was spent making money usually pushing pixels around a screen for other more powerful humans who already had money, as we all know the nano fabricator was then invented making money redundant, people inexpertly just used the machine to print more money.

The primary currency of earth then switched to Zimbabwe dollar, brain to brain interfaces didn’t really exist , so you just had to trust people when they told you things. Like, just because they said it, great system.

Each human lived in a country. Many countries had their own language, but English was most widely spoken at the time. We can only assume humans favored English based on highly logical spelling. yeh that’s pronounced as yatCH. 1500 of linguistic evolution ,

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YATCH

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Usually humans were expected to pick a political ideology, there were a few of them including liberal, conservative, heavy, team Edward and han shot first. It was very important to let people know on social media what your political opinions were especially if you never actively did anything about them in real life ever.

Each 21st century, country had a head human and to become the head human it was necessary to smile a lot and say things that made other humans feel nice. once you had become the head human you were then allowed to do pretty much what ever you wanted for a while and no one abused this power, ever.

Despite having the technology no one bothered to reach the other planets for a while as there was no great competition this was of course until Belgium unexpectedly became the first nation to conquer mars and went on to perfect nuclear fusion a theories of quantum gravity and shower gel which didn’t completely obliterate your bullocks, lovely

Everything was temporary, no one was really in charge and in about every 100 years or so the whole population would die and reset and that carried on for a while and everything was delightful and that’s pretty much the story I think,

Oh and Gillette was the best a man could get and red bull gave you wings and umm oh there was the machine uprising, did I mention that, the lands became little more than a desert of skeletons and the sky was blackened with perpetual nuclear winter and biology gave away to superior mechanical dominance, anyway next week cupcakes and soufflé a short history of human baking 


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